Little by little I've been getting a better idea of what I want to do with my life. My biggest dilemma is that most of the places I want to go are too far from all the people I love, so you're all going to have to come with me or I'm not leaving. I know that life is about change, but I don't want to accept that I wont always be within bussing distance of my friends and family. Since I moved I haven't done a very good job of making new friends. I've become known as the hermit, or the shut-in, who people see once a week or less. So leaving the country is scary, even though the idea of new things still excites me.

Nevertheless, I've given a lot of thought to my future career and there are a few things that appeal to me:

- owning an independent bookstore
- working in a museum
- something that has to do with writing

I just don't think my current degree is worth it. More and more I've been feeling like this isn't the right path to be taking, but I don't know what else there is. I think I need to talk to a careers advisor.

Still, even if I do change my papers or leave Vic completely, I've already got this huge debt to pay off. So perhaps I should take a year to save up, maybe get a flat and a full time job.

But I need to finish this year first, and I need to finish it well. Because I'm not going to make these last 7 months a waste of time. No. I'm going to home for the Christmas holidays proud of myself, so I can honestly say that I went to univeristy and I tried. I don't want to be known as the first of my family in generations to go to uni and fail.

Anyway, it's 2.32am. I should be getting to bed soon, or at least getting off the cmputer and reading for a bit :)

xx